Sitting outside the trailer

It's almost 10:00 on a Saturday night. Normally on a Saturday night I am trying to get to sleep thinking that I'm going to need all the energy I can get for the next day! Sundays are so crazy with traveling and presenting and meeting new people and acting cordial. :) Judah has added a new dimension of craziness to our Sunday meeting routine. He makes it interesting as I try to take care of his needs and also set up our display board and do my part of the presentation. It helps when there is a nursery for me to put him in, but not every church has a nursery. I always feel a little strange leaving him in the hands of complete strangers, but God usually puts some sweet ladies in the nursery to take care of Judah and I feel better about it.

Last Sunday was just awful, I have to say! Judah did not get his normal naps. He usually takes a morning nap, which usually gets missed on Sundays. But last Sunday he also missed his afternoon nap because we were busy packing up and eating and talking and traveling to our next meeting (we had two meetings last Sunday. One in the morning and afternoon at one church, and one in the evening at a different church). Needless to say, after spending the day with a VERY cranky 4.5 month old, we have decided never to try that kind of schedule again!

This week has been so strange for Judah. I don't know if he's teething, or maybe he's still reeling from our awful Sunday schedule, but he has not been napping well at all, which makes for an unhappy baby and a stressed out Mommy! As the week has gone on, it has gotten little bits of better, but not totally. I'm just hoping that this does not keep up, or else, Lord give me strength. I miss my happy and very contented little boy!

This is Labor Day weekend. Paige is spending it in Israel. I am so interested in the emails she has been sending us telling us of her activities! I just can't imagine being where she is right now! I hope to go there someday...and Disneyworld too. It's a toss up where I would go first if I had the chance. :)

Cleaning house

Andy and I have been working to organize some of our things in preparation for this June when we are going to turn over the parsonage to the Thorsens for two months. Our basement is absolutely a catastrophe right now. It's unlivable down there right now, so the past days since I've been up from bedrest, we've spent a lot of time down there going through boxes and throwing away stuff. I took some pictures of things I found that I thought some of you would get a kick out of seeing these items again.


My first and only Cabbage Patch doll from Jerry and Barb Gazaway. I named her "Bottom" because I like to lay my head on her soft bottom as a pillow!

A pair of my favorite pajamas. I got these for my birthday one year!

My "Girls Rule" shirt that Mom gave to each of us girls. I remember that we each wore ours quite often, so Greg said that every time he came to our house, someone was wearing that shirt!

My 'Amanda the Panda' shirt from the camp we went to as siblings after Dad passed away.

One of my favorite books! Somehow I would always find it in Paige's room though, I guess she liked it too!

A favorite nightgown of mine growing up.

My favorite summer outfit that I wanted to wear every day of the summer!


And lastly, my favorite find of the day, my blanket! Doesn't it look ratty? It was well used! I couldn't believe what condition it was in, but I still love it!

I'm going to SCREAM!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! That's it! I'm done! I've had it! No more laying down!!!!!!!! MORE SSSSSSCCCCCCCCCCRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAMMMMMMMIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm BACK!

Okay Deb, I lied. I am still going to post on this blog.

I've been inspired to start posting on this blog again. This morning I was reading some of my past entries and just started cracking up at the honest stories that I was able to relate. I also could not contain my chuckles as I read your comments. I just can't be this open and personal on our ministry blog. For instance, does the average supporter/Pastor in New York care what I did for New Years Eve this year? (Which was nothing by the way because of baby). But you guys care, right? Nonetheless, I fear I've lost my audience since it has been a long time since I posted anything new on the blog. I'll see how long it takes someone to read this. If you are out there reading this, leave a comment! Then I'll know my readership. :)

Well, What's going on that I can talk about? Right now I'm listening to 4Him's greatest Hits cd. My favorite oldie of theirs is "For Future Generations" followed by "Sacred Hideaway". Anyone else have a favorite oldie to offer up? Doesn't have to be 4Him...Petra, Audio A, Newsboys, Point of Grace and (my personal favorite) dcTalk are also welcome...as well as SCC--almost forgot that one! Oops!

It's Sunday and I am watching the CSBC congregation come out of church from my window across the room. Only one more Sunday and then I get to go to church again. The last time I was at church was on January 11th in Norwalk, IA. The last time I was at CSBC for a service was...January 4th, I think. But I'm not entirely sure about that because wasn't church canceled one of those weeks around the holidays because of awful winter weather? Anyone remember which week that was? If it was canceled on the 4th, then the last time I was at CSBC was LAST YEAR!! What in the world? That is crazy!

Speaking of other things I haven't done in awhile...I saw Samuel yesterday. I am pretty sure that is the first time I've seen him since Christmas, or at least early January. He looks so grown up! I asked him how he liked Spring Break last week, and he said he got to go to McDonalds to eat with the Walls. That would be my favorite thing too! McDonalds sounds good to me right now, but after watching "Super Size Me" yesterday, I'm not sure I want to touch the stuff again! Don't worry, I will.

I remember how I used to spend my Spring Breaks way back when. I remember riding my bike down to Fisher EVERY DAY and meeting friends there to play: Shauna Smith, Ashley Wills, Erin Johnson, Eric Hineman (sometimes) and Ashlee Duimstra would sometimes make an appearance too. Although, I don't remember Ashlee having a bike, but I do remember her making fun of mine! (She didn't know it was my bike at the time that she was mercilessly dissing it). I still give her a hard time about that even though she has apologized a million times! :)

Anyway, I hope Sam and Mom enjoyed their spring breaks this week. It was a wonderful week for spring break! The weather was fabulous! Spring is here! Thunderstorms are coming this next week, I hear. Those excite me too. I'm not as excited about tornadoes since last year's catastrophes. I do have one funny story from tornado season last year, however. Jeremy and Jodi were staying in their trailor in the church parking lot. The sirens went off and J&J came into our house and went to our basement. Andy and I didn't hear the sirens, so Jodi called us from our basement. We both got up really quick and Andy says I took off for the basement! He says it was so funny because I have never acted so scared! I laugh thinking about that. Mind you, this was after Parkersburg, so my nerves were a little on edge! Anyway, we four had a fun time waiting out the storm in the basement of the parsonage.

Today Andy is in Montevideo, MN doing a presentation. Mom is helping me with everything that I can't do while I am in bed--which is most everything except use the restroom and take a shower. It's 12:30 and Mom just walked in to make me lunch. Porkchops are on the menu! Gotta go and talk to her now!

More to come later!

Thinking about last year...

I've been thinking a lot about last year...what I was doing last year at this time. Tonight as I write this I think that last year on this night we were spending the night in the hospital. At this exact time, we would have just found out the bleak news regarding our family, and holding out hope for the morning. There is so much emotion as I think about our son's birthday tomorrow.

A missionary friend from CBM wrote me and helped me to imagine Collin celebrating his first birthday in heaven. Most kids don't remember their first birthday, will Collin remember his, or does he get to "grow up" in heaven? I think about him being up there with Jesus and his family who has gone before (and come after him in the past year). Are his cousin Grace and Grandpa Brant celebrating with him? I wonder what they do in heaven on earthly birthdays, or for that matter on anniversaries of joining the heavenly host. In Collin's case, it is the same day.

I miss our son. He would be one.

What I like about fall

Cooler weather
Turning leaves
School starting
Marching band practice
Fall decorating
Cross Country
Candy corn

God's grace

This week has been so productive. I'm so thankful to the Lord for that because I was praying that the Lord would allow me to establish a good schedule now that I am at home all the time. Last week at our ladies Bible study, Molly asked each of us to say something for which we needed God's grace. It was my turn and I asked for God's grace over my new schedule. That was something that was weighing on me. Ever since I have stopped working at McFarland Clinic, I haven't really had any time at home until last week (because of camps and weddings). So, I was struggling to establish regular daily habits while also trying to work around Andy's habits since he's also at home. I need to do my school work. The sooner I can get that done, the sooner we can have regular income to add to our support level. I also need to help Andy with the website. We have been working on that for around 8 months, so it's important for us to get that done. We also need to make a missions video update for a church in Dover, DE. There are also letters that need to be sent, letters that need to be written, items that need to be ordered, etc. So, I was just having a hard time organizing all of that, and I needed God's grace.
Well, this week I could definitely see the Lord helping me--in spite of the draw of the Olympics! On Monday we signed up for life insurance--something that needed to be done since I'm not working at McFarland anymore. On Tuesday the nurse lady came over to the house and did the mini physical required for that, so now I officially have life insurance. That's one thing done. I also applied for a job at MMSC (the hospital here in town) for a part-time medical transcription job. I made sure to tell them on the application that I'm not finished with my schooling yet, but that I have lots of experience in the medical field, so I'm familiar with how some things work. They called me on Tuesday morning and want me to come in for an interview next Wednesday morning (the 20th). It would be great if I could get this job and then work from home or from a different state! That's what is so great about transcription. Plus it would be nice to work for someone from Marshalltown so I can have some sort of connection to the people for whom I am working.
I was also able to complete almost 2 chapters of my school work this week--that is amazing!! Each chapter takes FOREVER! Andy and I finished the missions video! So now we can start showing it for our meetings that we have right now--including our update to our home church on August 31st! That will be cool. We have the "August Rush" soundtrack as our background music--love that movie (P.S. that's also Shawn Johnson's floor routine music--did you notice?)
We also got most of our website published to the web, thanks in LARGE part to Luke Demarest! That was such a blessing to get something published after working on it for so long.
So, I am praising the Lord for allowing such a productive week for Andy and I both. Andy was able to schedule some meetings for our next trip out East. It is hard for me to listen to him make phone calls because he just puts himself out there--so vulnerable to pastors who can sometimes be so warm and receiving, but can also be so insensitive and rude. You never know who you're going to get. I usually have my devotions while he does most of his calling so that I can just pray for him. I can see that sometimes it's very hard for him to make phone calls because not everyone is as considerate as he is.
Thank you God for teaching me about your grace. I've been learning how your grace extends so much farther beyond saving grace. It is also grace that works in us to will and to do good. It is your grace that makes me want to come to you, to please you, to honor you. It is your grace that I need each day to obey and to remember your love for me. Your grace keeps me on track--I don't keep myself on track. Thank you for your grace this week to allow me to honor you in how I spend my time and energy, and for letting me get so much accomplished. Please multiply your grace toward me this month, this is such an important lesson for me to learn right now.

I miss Paige

Well, Paige got married last weekend. A week ago today I was helping Paige and Patrick set up tables and practicing my hair for the wedding--not at the same time. Last week was so much fun, that I find myself extremely bored these days. One night I lie awake thinking about how much I now miss my sister Paige. Right now she is on her honeymoon in Vienna, Austria. She will soon be returning home, but not to Marshalltown, she will go home to Bakersfield, California. I failed to realize this fact until she was leaving the church to go on her honeymoon. I had been so much enjoying our time together that it never occurred to me that it would end. I told Paige once that every time I thought about her wedding, I would get excited not so much about the wedding, but because it meant she was coming home. I also enjoyed my time with Deb and Luke last week, and guess what? They left too. Fortunately we get to see Deb and Luke a little more often that Paige and Patrick, but I still wish that both sisters lived close to me (or I close to them) so that we could see each other more. One of my favorite parts of last week was going to see the movie "Mama Mia." That movie was so great--I loved the music. There were parts that I wish they would have left out--I would have enjoyed it so much more (think Moulin Rouge), but I will definitely have to at least get the soundtrack.

Happy Independence Day!

Yesterday we had some great food and fellowship! It was a smaller crowd at Mom's, but it was still really fun! I wish I had a digital camera sometimes, because I would like to put a picture up that I took of everyone yesterday. If I could post it here it would have Hirsch & Tracy, Amanda & Greg & kids, Mom & Rick, J.J. and Andy & me. I wish that I could have been outside more, but we still had a great day. We made ice cream in the ball thing, and it turned out GREAT! I can't wait to do it again! The weather has been great around here lately! I bought a new swimsuit the other day because when Deb comes home, I might go to the pool with everyone if I don't have to work. I've never been to the Aquatic Center here in Marshalltown, so if it works out, I'm excited to go and I hope Andy comes too. Tomorrow we have a meeting in Walnut, IA. It's about 2 1/2 hours away, and we're planning on driving there Sunday morning--not spending the night there on Saturday like we usually do. We have to be there by 8:45, so we'll probably leave here by 6:15. I'll go to bed early tonight so I can get up at 5:00 probably. I have to work on Monday morning. This will be the last time that I will have to come home late from a meeting, and then go to work on Monday morning. I won't miss that at all. This next week will be my last week working at McFarland Clinic. I've worked with McFarland off and on for almost 10 years. That's insane. They have always been good to me though. I'll probably end up there again sometime--knowing my history!

Time for a change

I saw Deb's blog today and I really liked her addition of more pictures to her blog, so I decided to change my blog appearance too. Well, it's been awhile since I've written. Pastor Hirsch was really nice last week to make sure that we could access the church's wireless signal while we are living at the parsonage. So, we now have internet at home, and I've been taking advantage of that. Maybe some of you have noticed an increase in emailing activity. Maybe you haven't. Either way, it's cool.

We grilled out tonight. I bought Andy a grill for his birthday, just one of the cheaper ones at Wal-Mart. He has really enjoyed learning how to grill. Every time we grill, we make the same appetizer. We spread tortilla chips out on a pizza pan that is covered in tin foil. Then we put salsa and shredded cheese on top of the chips. We put the pan on the grill until the cheese has melted. It is so good! We got this idea one time when we were eating with a pastor in Kansas City, KS. I'm pretty sure they put some other things on the chips like meat or something, but we like ours pretty plain. Whenever I think about shredded cheese, I remember that we never had it growing up. Mom would get a block of cheese and then use a cheese grater to shred the cheese herself. I'm happy to buy the cheese that has already been shredded for me. I haven't priced the two items to see which is cheaper, so I may be spending more than I need to.

Last weekend we went to Cabela's in Owatonna, MN before our meeting in Faribault, MN. We got one of those balls that you can use to make homemade ice cream. Have you seen them? You put the ice, rock salt, and cream into the ball and roll it around--just like a normal ball--and the rolling/throwing (but not kicking) action mixes the ingredients to make the ice cream. I'm anxious to try it. I got ingredients to try it this weekend over the 4th of July. We're going to make vanilla, I hope it turns out to be yummy!

Pretty much the worst experience to date

Okay, I'm hoping that no one sees this who shouldn't, but I just have to write about last weekend. It was so crazy! I'll use nebulous language when referring to specific people/places/things so as not to offend anyone. (I love that word--you know which one). Last Friday and Saturday we were with our favorite Marylanders, the Clarks, and it was a great time--this is not at all included in the bad weekend. On Friday night they took us out to eat and we watched a movie at their house. On Saturday we went to Annapolis and saw the Navy academy and made plans to meet up there again in October to go on the "ghost tour." I don't know if that would excite anyone else, but I am pretty stoked about the idea of having someone lead me around and showing me all the so-called "haunted" places in Annapolis. Pastor Brian said that he and his son did one of those in Gettysburg, and their tour guide was convinced that he was a reincarnated civil war veteran. He and his son laughed through the whole thing, and that story made me laugh really hard. I always laugh so hard with them!
Anyway, so after a great two days with them we headed to our meeting in let's just say the Trenton area. The pastor led us to the place we would be staying and it was with an aging lady (let's call her Liva) who lived in a very cramped apartment. Thankfully Liva did have two bedrooms, but unfortunately, our bedroom door did not close, and our two bedrooms were right across the hall from each other. Uhhh. We had little room to spare once we got our luggage in--which by the way, we have too much luggage this time around for some reason. I think it's because we had absolutely no idea what the weather would be like. It was snowing in Iowa when we left, and today it was 87 degrees in New Jersey. Anyway, we got settled in at this apartment and listened as Liva told us in depth about her life, which was interesting to a degree. We went out to dinner that evening with the pastor and his wife, and the pastor mentioned casually to not eat anything that Liva offered us because past missionaries who have stayed there have gotten sick off of her food. Uhhh. The next morning we took Liva to church with us and she and Andy had words about which way to get to church. Andy likes to stick with Mandy (our GPS), and I don't think our host even realized we had Mandy leading us on the straight and narrow (a similarity to the other Mandy in our lives). :) After Sunday's activities we came back to Liva's house and settled in for another night. We watched an episode of the Office on our computer, and wondered if she could hear it since we couldn't shut our bedroom door, I'm pretty sure she couldn't hear it. The next morning we were ready to leave, and we headed off for New York for a couple of meetings with pastors. We were looking forward to that evening when we were staying in a motel. Now, here comes the worst part. Andy was feeling really sick Monday night, and couldn't figure out why. He hardly ate dinner, but just figured that he was stressed out. The next morning he found a tick on himself! Ahhhh!!!!! Where did he pick that up???? We had been either in the van, or in Liva's house for the last three days! I can only believe that he got it at Liva's house--she had sooo many plants in her house that she had just brought in because they had freezing temperatures. I had to get the tick out of him, but I was virtually at the point of tears because I was so grossed out. I was not able to get all of it out. I wanted Andy to go to the Dr. right away to get it out and to get antibiotics for Lyme disease, but he wouldn't go until after our meetings. So as we were sitting in the New Jersey pastor's fellowship seminar that morning, all I could think about was this tick in Andy---sorry if you are getting grossed out like I was. You can stop reading if you want. After we got to our resting place for the night, I called a local family practice office and got Andy an appointment with a doctor for 6:30 that night. We went and I'm glad to say the tick is gone now. As Andy came out of the doctor's office he said to the receptionist, 'Well, we got the bug out!' and everyone in the waiting room heard, and I was a little ashamed. shhh! That's so gross. I will not show you a picture of a tick, it is too gross, instead I have attached a picture of something very pleasant to me--a picture of the Clarks. :)

oddities out East

We've spent a little over 40 hours in the van in the last week and a half, and I've heard many artists on the radio that I haven't heard in years. I've heard "Don't go Chasing Waterfalls" by TLC twice, Ace of Base songs twice and Real McCoy twice. There must be more demand for songs from the early 90's around here. That is something I can support, I've enjoyed singing along. I will always proclaim the "jughandle" one of the weirdest things about the East coast, specifically New Jersey. Today we had someone honk at us because we were making a left-hand turn instead of using the "jughandle." Also in New Jersey they don't let you pump your own gas and that frustrates Andy. This isn't so much an oddity as it is a really fun time, but yesterday I went to the biggest thrift store that I have ever been to. I went with a friend in New Jersey, and it was awesome. I always like to get stuff for Andy when I shop at thrift stores. I can usually find some brand name dress shirts and some jeans that he can work in. That was a lot of fun. While I was there, Andy went to the biggest tool market that he's ever been to. He picked up another antique tool to add to our display table. We've learned some things out here too. We've learned about Jewish building techniques, Andy has decided to add the word "ambiance" to his vocabulary. Also, thanks to a pastor in Newfield, NJ, Andy and I have stopped to consider the redundancy of Panera Bread...don't ask. sheesh.

Hershey, PA

Well, we're out East again. We haven't even had our first meeting yet, but it feels like we've been here forever. I think it's all those miles in the van. The first day we traveled eight hours, the second day was twelve hours, and today was only around four hours. We had a fun day today. Last night we stayed in a Bed and Breakfast in Pennsylvania. The people who own it let missionaries and pastors stay there for free, so that was a special blessing for us. The only problem was that they don't have televisions in their rooms, and I really wanted to watch Thursday night TV. We brought along "The Bee Movie" from our Netflix subscription, so we watched that. It was a cute movie. So, this morning the lady made us a really good breakfast, and Andy was happy about that. We decided to spend our day in Hershey, PA since we didn't have to be at our overnight place until 5:00. I wanted to tour the Chocolate factory, but we couldn't see the actual factory where they make the chocolate. We went to Chocolate World in Hershey and learned all about Milton Hershey. He and his wife did a lot of great things for their community and for kids all over the U.S. We bought Paige and Patrick's wedding present today (!!!) and some other gifts. I got a sweatshirt that reminds me of Deb because I think she has one like it. After we were done there we went to the local Panera Bread and I told Andy that I love that restaurant! After that we decided to head for Glen Burnie, MD. We have a supporting church there and the pastor there is awesome! He's the one that took us to Ocean's 13 in the theater when we first met them last year. He and his wife and their kids are so much fun, and we always try to see them when we are out this way. Them and Pastor Jim Johnson, whom you will remember from a former post on this blog.

I have some pictures to share from Christmas and New Years. It was a nice Christmas this year. I was glad that I had Paige's homecoming to look forward to this year, and then I got to do some wedding things with her to, which was so fun. I usually enjoy New Years Eve quite a bit because it's more low key and full of games! A lot of us went over to Amanda and Greg's to play games. Of course in order to do that, we had to break into Amanda's hope chest to get the games. We were successful--due in large part to Amy's awesome hammer and screw driver skills. I thought it was quite funny that Greg stayed totally out of the whole process, presumably so that in case we failed to get it reconstructed, he wouldn't have to get stuck putting it all back together! :) We had a good laugh about that. But, we succeded, and the games were a sight to see as Amanda saw ones that she had forgotten about even! I included a picture of Steve holding the lock that he took off even though he had previously told Amy that we shouldn't take it off--just another sign that Amy was in charge of this project, and she was the reason we were succesful! :) HAHA. We played the DVD version of Trivial Pursuit on teams (Paige&Liz vs. Amanda&Greg vs. Steve&Amy). And...Paige and I won! I've become very proud of this fact seeing as how Paige and I had never played a complete game of Trivial Pursuit in our lives, having sworn it off as kids since it was "too hard and boring." So Amy would play with us and we would make videos or make snow cats! We should have done that!! Next year... I also included a picture of Andy and I on our 4th Anniversary at the Schwartzenburgs. And a picture of Erica and Alaina and Amy and James at church. James just started rubbing Alaina's back randomly and it was cute!

Pastor Jim

Everytime we come to the East coast, we spend at least one day with a pastor friend of ours, Jim Johnson. He is probably my second afro-american friend (behind Kniambi Jones in 6th grade, birthday March 3--haha) seeing as how there aren't a lot of afro-americans where I'm from--at least not compared to the East coast! Anyway, he is a lot of fun, and Andy and I really like him a lot. Tonight he took us out to eat at TGI Fridays. He said something really funny on the way there. He said that everyone should speak in third grade english so that everyone knows whats going on, "otherwise, things just kinda hang out there being all ambiguous and stuff." I thought that was funny, and true. So many times we can misunderstand each other in relationships and in everyday conversations. If we just talked like we would to a third grader, there probably would be more clarity in the world. This reminds me of my favorite word in the English language: nebulous. I remember teaching Paige that word after I discovered it. I don't know which teacher in highschool introduced me to that word, probably Alix P. Martin.

The last two days

Oh my word! The last two days have been so fun for me! Andy and I are out in New Jersey/Pennsylvania/Maryland/Delaware/Virginia this week and next. Yesterday we took a day trip to Lancaster, PA. It is well know for its Amish community. We got there kind of late in the morning, and it was kind of a crummy day as far as the weather, but we wanted to walk around the shops. We were able to go into many neat shops that have the nice Amish woodwork, quilts, jams, jellys, candy, etc. It was really fun to see the horse-drawn buggies, and the little girls running around in their dresses and bonnets. That afternoon we went to Sight and Sound. It was in one word--Awesome!! I can't even describe how much it meant to me to see this drama. This drama team performed the creation story in musical form. It was probably 2 1/2 hours in length. If any of you are ever near Lancaster, I need to tell you to go to Sight and Sound! While we were in Amish country Andy made up this song as we were going down the road. It was so impromptu, and it made me laugh right out loud!


The root beer I want to drink
The woodwork is hard to beat,
Oh! To be Amish!
Oh! To be Amish!

The jelly is yummy to taste
the salsa is even better
Oh! To be Amish!
Oh! To be Amish!

The Amish ride in little buggies
Until they get hit by a school bus
Woe! To the Amish!
Woe! To the Amish!


That song made me laugh so hard--especially since Andy doesn't usually sing. But it was a song just waiting to come out, I guess.

Then today we spent all afternoon with the Gazaways: Jerry, Barb, and Aidan. That was so fun! We met them at Houlihans in the Cherry Hill Mall in Cherry Hill, NJ. We had a great time talking about our trip, Aidan, memories, etc. Then they took us to Tom and Mel's house (which they weren't there because they are on a cruise). We talked for awhile, and then Jerry wanted to take us on a "who cares tour" of Camden--except he said that we would care! :) It was disturbing to see the condition of that city--named the second worst city in America, besides Detroit. It just revalidated the need for missions in North America to us! There were a lot of fun times with Jerry and Barb, and we laughed A LOT! It was so fun! But the best line of the night came at supper (at Olive Garden) when Andy asked Jerry when he usually leaves for California in the winter and Jerry said "oh, somewhere between the 31st and the 1st." (meaning 31st of december and 1st of January.) Oh man! Barb and I both laughed! It was one of those times where I could not stop giggling about it--and I felt bad for laughing, I didn't want to make anyone feel bad, but it was so funny!
These last two days have been wonderful. Thank you, Jesus, for family and friends who are as close as family. What a blessing to me at this time!

Memories of August 28, 2007

One month ago today my sweet son Collin was born. I remember him today as I go through life's normal activities, but it doesn't seem normal to me anymore. I remember waking up in my hospital room. I felt awake, and I was surprised since I had to take a sleeping pill to get to sleep the night before. Dr. McCarville came in to do an ultrasound and we found that the fluid had not reformed around Collin. Dr. said that I could induce labor, or wait it out. If I wanted to wait until I naturally went into labor, then I would have to wait at the hospital in Des Moines. I did not want to leave Marshalltown! I had a peace in my heart that everything was supposed to end at home in Marshalltown. Andy and I spent a long time together talking and crying. At 10:00 we met with Pastor Hirsch, Nancy Pins, and Andrea Terrones. We talked to them about what we should do. Should we induce labor, or go to Des Moines? We decided to wait it out and go to Des Moines, even though in my heart I wanted to stay in Marshalltown. After they left, I lay in my bed and contemplated what would happen next, but I noticed that I was starting to get more and more uncomfortable. Nancy informed me that my pain was a significant change, and she told Dr. McCarville. The Dr. checked and I was dialated and starting labor. We decided to induce labor and speed the process along. Time went really fast after that. I don't remember a lot about who I talked with or who I cried with. But I know there were people who came to pray and to wait with me. I remember hearing that Deborah was coming to see me, I was so thankful, I cried. The pain got worse and Dr. Dowell came in to check on me. He told my nurse, Kristi, that I was ready to deliver. The labor went quickly and I do not remember a lot of pain. Collin was born at 3:20pm. Andy and I got to hold him and look at him. We shared him with our parents and family who were there, along with some special friends. We loved looking at his mouth, ears, hands, feet, nose, shoulders...everything. We have great memories of admiring Collin. We took pictures to help us remember him wrapped in his green blanket. I had no idea how I would ever give him up to the nurse. I dreaded having to let him go. To this day, I don't know how I did. People say I was strong. I know it was God-supplied strength. Right now I feel weaker. So many memories of that day flood my mind now. I hope I never forget.

1 month ago today....

One month ago today I sat at work, 5 months pregnant. It was a Monday and I was feeling tired. We had gotten home that morning around 1:30 (I think) from a long drive home from the Chicago area. I remember being at work and seeing people that I knew. Linda Holvick gave me a hug and congratulated me on my pregnancy. It was the first time that we had seen each other in a long time. I remember sitting all day beside a lady who had a bad cold, and I prayed that I would not get sick because I didn't want to harm the baby. I remember saying to her at the end of the day..."I think we're all ready to go home tonight." I was tired. I went home like normal and Andy and I decided to have pizza and watch a movie. Our Monday nights used to be pretty much useless since we were so tired after presenting on Sunday and driving all night on Sunday. Then my water broke. I did not know what was going on. I was so scared. I called my sister...not home. I called my mom...not home. I finally decided to call 911, and without them confirming my fears, they told me that someone would be out to my house to pick me up shortly. I rode to the hospital with Andy in the back of an ambulance. Mom followed us in her car. I was so scared, yet I felt confident in God's ability to take care of me. We sat and waited for the nurse to take us to a room. We cried. A nurse finally came and we followed her to a procedure room. They still did not yet confirm my fear that my water broke, although Andy and I were both pretty sure that is what happened. After doing some labwork, it was still not conclusive to the Dr. whether my water had broken or not, so they transferred me to the OB department. A new Dr. came in and we did an ultrasound. Our worst fears were confirmed...my water broke and short of a miracle I would go into labor sometime within the next 48 hours. I remember having a soothing peace that if it was the Lord's will, that He would cause the fluid to reform and I would carry the baby to full term. The Dr. said that sometimes happens. We prayed. We wanted everyone to pray. I felt the most calm when others were praying with me. It all happened so fast. I went into the hospital around 7:30, and before I knew it, it was 10:30 and they were asking me if I wanted help getting to sleep. We prepared ourselves to spend the night there; Mom stayed with us. I laid in bed thinking about everything, not able to slow down my thoughts or my heart. I prayed that if it was the Lord's will that He would reform the fluid and that I would not go into labor. August 27, 2007. A day that ended much differently than it started. I will remember this day forever.

Questions.

Why me?

What do I have to learn?

What do You seek to teach me?

How will this change me?

Will I be okay?

How will I go on?

What's the next step?

I can't go back to normal.

Such a long time!!!

It has been a long time since I've written anything on this blog. It's hard for me to think of things to write. But I guess I should have something to write at least every week since we travel someplace new every weekend. Sorry it's been so long, Deb. I do have something interesting to relay this morning though. This last weekend was full of things that took a long time! Andy and I were on our way to Chesterton, IN. Chesterton is just across the Illinois/Indiana border. Our estimated total time of travel was going to be around 6 hours, not including stops to get out and walk, use the restroom, or have lunch. Instead our trip took a total of 12 hours! It took us 6 hours to get to the toll booth on interstate 80-94, and another 6 hours to get from that toll booth to our destination (that leg of the trip was only supposed to be a half hour). It was awful! I had to get out of that car and walk and go to the bathroom so bad! By the time we finally got to a gas station, it was another long wait just to use the restroom! We got back in the car only to join another traffic jam, so we stopped to have pizza. After all of that, we finally got to the pastor's house--only 6 hours late! Thank the Lord we didn't have any trouble getting back home last night. For those of you wondering why the traffic was so bad, it was because of the recent rains in the Chicago area last week. I guess there was standing water on the Eastbound lanes, so they were forcing everyone off of the interstate at exit 1 in Indiana. I'm just thankful that we encountered that on our way out, and not on our way home.